Hello and welcome to Deep Dark Thoughts! In this blog we'll explore all things related to creativity, game design, and probably other tangents I haven't thought of yet.

Writing a first blog post feels like shouting into the void, so I'm going to shift perspectives: how will this post be used in a year? In 5 years? Because right now, my audience of *checks notes* zero readers won't benefit from this, but my future audience of *checks crystal ball* 10 million readers may find it interesting.

So this is for you, future reader, an artefact to find when digging through the archives. May it stand the tests of time.

Looking up at the mountain

I am looking up at a mountain. It's huge. I've seen cool mountain climbers on the internet, admired what they do, thought "hey, I want to do that". But when you get to the bottom it's a little steeper than you imagined, a little chillier than you hoped, and there isn't even a damn trail marked.

In case this metaphor sucks, the mountain is my aspirations and the cool mountain climbers are game designers. Or maybe they are artists, or developers, or community leaders.

It doesn't really matter, what matters is the task ahead looks frickin' hard.

I need to keep the top of the mountain in sight. I'm too much of an experimenter and iterater to plan an exact path, but I need a target.

So let's make some goals for 2024 and start climbing this thing.

• Make, playtest, and release games. Let's say 3.
• Crowdfund a game. Maybe two.
• Attend some events, meet cool people, play cool games.
• Have good conversations with inspiring designers. Maybe write a post, a podcast, or keep them secret forever.
• Engage more in communities, online and in person.
• Play more games! Play different games!
• Create content (shudder) at some reasonable pace, whether on this blog, or YouTube, or some more artistic and less capitalistic manner.

Or am I looking down the mountain?

OK, scratch the "looking up at a mountain" metaphor. I actually think I'm looking down a mountain and am wearing skis. Same feelings apply: too steep, too cold, yada yada yada.

But I know that once I get going I'll be closer to the bottom. I may snowplow, I may fall, I may slide on my back, gazing at the clouds, skis lost in the rhubarb. But every inch down is an inch closer to where I need to be, and if I can get some momentum? I'll feel like the Gold Boarder in 1080 Snowboarding.

Hopefully you catch my drift before this metaphor also goes off the rails (🙃).

I need momentum. The first part will be really hard, but the second part will be easier because the first part was hard. I will probably suck. I will probably crash. But the more momentum I can build, the easier the rest becomes.

Stop worrying about the mountain

Nevermind, ignore the mountain. Bad metaphors, both of them. Nobody even remembers 1080 Snowboarding.

This is the first blog post of Deep Dark Thoughts. It means nothing on it's own, but it's the first dot on a line, the first step on a trail, the first wild dart on the board.

This post doesn't matter but the trajectory does. When measured against everything that comes after, this post becomes important.

I'm going to stop worrying about the mountain and just begin climbing. Skiing. Doing.

So tell me, future reader, how far up did I make it?

Stay tuned for more Deep Dark Thoughts as I dial down the "self-motivation" and dial up the "making cool stuff", like the exciting crowdfunding of HOME - a roleplaying and mapmaking game where Mech fight Kaiju!